Waking up at 5AM and couldn't get back to sleep, I decided to brush my teeth and my hair, take my Bible and spend time with the Lord at the park. As those who know me are aware that I use the Revised Common Lectionary for my morning quiet time, and the previous Sunday's Gospel reading was Mark 12:38-44. Having found my favorite spot, I opened the Bible and read.

As I read, I couldn't help but take the passage personally! "Watch out for the teachers of the Law" Jesus says. Who were the teachers of the law during Jesus' time? Those who were learned-- the theologians/ministers/lawyers/religious professionals of the day. They may find their equivalent in this era as those who have seminary degrees, ministers, pastors, preachers-- people whom my seminary professor calls "those who get paid for being religious." As a person with a degree in theology and have gone to seminary and serving as a pastor in the church, I certainly couldn't deny the fact that I fall in that category, teacher of the law!

They like to walk around in flowing robes. I'm glad that in the church where I serve, I am not required to wear a robe that distinguishes me for my training. But I must admit, the professional religious love the feeling of wearing an academic robe albeit done once a year in seminary graduations. I once was asked to deliver a homily in a chapel service in a seminary and to wear an alb and a green stole. Did I have a choice? Well, not really. Part of their tradition is that priests/ministers wear vestments when performing religious duties. I wore the garb so as not to offend and lose an opportunity to minister.

...and be greeted in the market-places. One of the strange realities in my vocation is that there's not a place I've been where I was not met or greeted by someone who knows me. Whether it's on Orchard Road in Singapore or at Sonja's Garden in Tagaytay, the Hot Air Baloon Festival in Pampanga or at SM City Baguio, someone would walk up to greet me, "Hi Pastor! I go to GCF." When someone who knows me approaches me, I do not want to be rude and ignore. I will greet back and reciprocate the warmth I have been extended. Being known by people I haven't met comes with the position I hold. But it is not supposed to reach my head! 

And who would not want a 10% "ministerial discount" on a meal in Zamboanga or being told by a waiter at Italianni's that my check has been paid for by someone who didn't want to be identified? Such are the "blessings" of the pastoral vocation to quote a well known evangelical bishop!

...and have the most important seats in the synagogues and the places of honour at banquets. I rarely have control over such things. In more than one occasion I have found my name written on a nice gilded card standing on tables of prominence or stuck to a chair in a concert hall.  Who has control over such? Even if I didn't want to sit in chairs assigned to me, I couldn't help but to do so. People do the assigning and I hardly have any choice.

...and for a show make lenghty prayers. When I find myself in gatherings- special events, the pastor always gets to be asked to pray. And people get disappointed with a minister who prays very simply. They expect flowery words and witty idioms, figures of speech and some form of religious gibberish! They expect something better than "God is great, God is good, let us thank Him for our food. Amen." 

Such men will be punished most severely. When I got to this point I asked, "Will I get punished for obeying my calling?" And the Lord's answer is definitely NOT. It is when religious leaders- the teachers of the law lose the heart of the matter which is serving God and the "performance" of their duties becomes a show that God is displeased. While even during Jesus' day not all religious leaders were frauds, many of them used their position and influence in greedy and cruel manner taking advantage of those they can fool.

As I continued reading about the generous widow who gave her all I reflected on how much more important it is for God to obey Him. He is merely concerned with the amount that we give to the "temple treasuries" of our day but with the heart behind the giving.

Today, believers give or serve out of the excess time and resources they have, or at their own convenience.

Christ was addressing this very issue in observing the widow giving her last mite! It wasn't convenient to give away the last of what she had to subsist with, but she gave it anyway.

And friends, that’s the real inspiration for how we can properly organize our commitments and priorities. It’s a matter of giving out of our freedom in the light of God’s grace. Of course, no one can tell us exactly how this should play out in our individual lives. On the other hand, we have the testimony of Jesus’ life and teachings that effectively peels away our veneers so that we might be restored, and in turn, become agents of transformation ourselves.

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A vagrant's breakfast. After my quiet time I had breakfast at a newly opened Spanish restaurant across the street. I was wearing sweat pants, fli flops and a wrinkled Tshirt. I must say, I didn't look my best. I entered. All eyes were on me. I could feel that because of how I was dressed the servers and the manager himself took me for a penniless vagabond. No one pointed me to a table, and it took a while before a server handed me a menu. I ordered and was served a half a cup of rice, an egg and corned beef hash. I wondered why the people on the next table who ordered the same meal I did had two eggs each, larger servings of corned beef and more rice! They were eating on fine china while mine were some cheap ceramic wear! I ordered another meal because the serving I got was just too little, but this time I wanted it "take out." They dumped my order in a styrofoam container and put it in a plastic bag. I put my payment in the billfold and stuck P150 ($3) as tip (I figured, even if they did not serve well, I should counter their horrible service with something good).

I took a peek into the bag and noticed a couple of other things missing-- butter and marmalade, coffee, juice and preserved fruits just as the menu said the meal should come with. I walked back to the restaurant and asked for the missing stuff. The manager said, "OK." I was asked to wait outside! I noticed the billfold was still on the table where I ate. A server got it and saw that it was P150 more than my bill. The server came out to meet me just as the manager was about to hand me the bag. The server said, "Sir, you paid more than your bill! Here's your P150 back." "No, that's intended as a tip." The manager asked, "Do you work around here?" I said, "No, I live in the condo across the street." Apologetically he said, "Oh sir, we all thought you were a vagrant (tambay)!" I jokingly said, "Well I get that a lot." The manager was patting my shoulder repeatedly saying "sorry, sir" as I walked away. It's funny how we all tend to judge others based on appearance!

Any lessons learned? Even when some treat you horribly, treat them nicely-- it will totally change their perspective on you, others and things.

I had just returned from a two-day summit called the Global Leadership Summit sponsored by the Willow Creek Association. Today's entry are just some of the gleaned and chewed on truths from that summit.

Unsure but Secure. Two nights ago, I was chatting on the internet with a friend who is currently in seminary about "calling." She shared with me that even as she is sure that God has called her to the vocational-ordained ministry she isn't sure where and what concentration. She had been my friend for ten long years now (since 1999 back when I was a freshman in Bible college) and although she hadn't pursued a degree theology just yet then she'd always been sure of having that sense of calling to become minister of some sort. But now that she's nearing her final semesters in the seminary where I also went she feels she is facing one of the greatest uncertainties of her life.

It was a joy for me to find out that evening we chatted to learn that she was going to Willow Creek's Global Leadership Summit. It was an opportunity for me to meet up with her in person and talk further about that call.

In the morning of the summit's first day, I called her on her mobile during the coffee break. Her voice seemed shaky as if she had just finished crying. I learned later that she and girlfriends from seminary were in a vehicular collision on the way to the summit. While none of them were harmed or injured they were all emotionally jittered perhaps at the thought that they could have lost their lives in an instant. While it was a scary ordeal, it was an assurance from the Lord that He still isn't done with them (her) just yet-- thus, an answer to her uncertainty that though she isn't sure what and where, God has a plan for her life and ministry. Additionally, the talks in that summit supplied the encouragement she needed so much.

In his talk, Bill Hybels mentioned of a time when he was ready to cash it all in-- a moment in his life when he was unsure whether he was called to do what he was doing. Discouragements, set backs, frustrations and issues gnawed at his spirit, inch by inch devouring what used to be the passionate Bill who chucked the opportunity of running the businesses his father built in a span of three decades for a calling he felt came from God- to begin a radical Biblical community. He ended up disappointing his dad for choosing to start a church than running his businesses. It was on the second year of Willow Creek's existence when Bill's dad died never seeing in person the kind of church his son was instrumental to starting turned out to be.

God spoke to summit attendees facing the same struggle. In what seemed like a whisper or an impression on my spirit, He said, "You may feel unsure but I want you to feel secure- I'm in total control."

Wayne Cordeiro on Monasticism. Part of my lectures in Church History to my students is on Monasticism. I was never a fan of monasticism for tone major reason:  the church is called to be in the world and permeate it with the kingdom of God and gospel of Christ, and seclusion defeats that calling.

Tonight as I slipped into the quietness of my condo I hope to get some much needed sleep after a whole day of intellectual and spiritual engagement at the summit, in addition to a lengthy music rehearsal for tomorrow's services. Even as I type this blog, my head races toward stuff I'm assigned to do at next weekend's discipleship conference our church is hosting.

For almost eleven months, I straggled between serving as our church's worship pastor (a post I've held since 2002, on staff since '01) and as adjunct professor in a local Bible college on my days off. I must admit, I have grown tired. Since the beginning of the semestral break, I had been attempting to rest and engage in the discipline of silence.

Given my personality type- being possessed by the energizer bunny spirit that just goes on and on and on, silence just doesn't seem a discipline for which I am cut out. Besides, with the many demands of ministry, I haven't had a real break. At the summit I was once again reminded of that.

Pastor Wayne Cordeiro, pastor of New Hope Church Oahu, shared his personal story about reaching a point when he felt like a flickering wick. 

Someone suggested that he spend seven days in a monastery to get his heart set with the Lord outside the hustle and bustle of city and megachurch life. For the first time, I saw the beauty of and a divine design for monasticism- we need to withdraw from the hustle and bustle of life, and quiet our heart before God- shutting out all other voices except God's. Pastor Cordeiro's decision was life-changing. Amidst a crowd of 2100 people at the summit, I tried shutting out all other noises and decided to listen to His whisper again--"Come away with me."

More from the Summit on my next blog entry...

Tom: "You don't want to be named as someone's girlfriend, and now your someone's wife?"

Maybe it was the interesting non-linear concept. Perhaps the witty quips and lines that give away the giftedness and brilliance of the writers, Neudstadter and Weber. Probably the players' amazing and natural acting skills that gave life to the story. Maybe all of the above. The flick 500 Days of Summer has officially entered and taken a prominent spot in my hall of favorite movies. It is not a love story, but it is a story about love.

It's fresh- a love story from a guy's perspective. Most romantic movies are written from the other gender's point of view, so it's new- to me at least. A movie about boy meets girl, boy falls in love with girl.  Girl doesn’t. She breaks the mould of what one would expect of a typical romantic comedy. Tom, the male lead of the movie believes in love while Summer the female lead does not. Sure it was a movie with roles switched- Tom becomes the lovestruck female-esqe type character while Summer portrays the free-loving, no-strings-attached male-esqe type character. But that happens in real life too- boys misled. I once was (Man! That was hardest three-letter sentence to type!).

Sure, it does not fall under the category of movies like Facing the Giant, Fireproof or The Ten Commandments; it does have some crude language; it doesn't portray the values I embrace, but it does  give a fine exegesis (interpretation/explanation/portrayal) of what romantic everyday life looks like for some unlucky dude somewhere in the world. And oh, I have reason to believe that many post-adolescent men on earth may be able to relate with the story one way or another or at some point in it. After watching the movie, a friend said, "We've all had a 'Summer' season in our lives somehow." I agreed.

All of us have been hurt. But I also know that forgiveness allows us the opportunity to retell the story in a way that ushers us on to a new and brighter future. We can rewrite the script so that the past no longer has us bound.

Whatever happened has happened. The facts are real. The tangible evidence is there and the scars are proof. Something happened and our reality is our reality. But I think it would be pretty foolish of me to speak as though I were an expert or had some sort of special knowledge. I am not. I do not. Like you, I have my stories. I know both sides.

But there's another twist. "Some weeks are better than others" so the narrator in the movie states; we are right a whole lot of times but not every time. It allows us to admit that sometimes no matter how hard we struggle, we sometimes fail. Sometimes we are the offender – not always the offended.  And what should I do? Ask to be forgiven.

A final thought- a reflection.

Most movies are exegeses of what may be happening to our culture, or it could be a suggestion about what filmmakers (exegetes) think should be happening. Just like a preacher interprets scripture and relate it to daily life with it, or takes scripture and address issues in people's lives.

Filmmakers are good exegetes of culture, most ministers aren't.  But we should be as good. How can we learn issues in culture if we do not exegete it rightly and apply Biblical exegesis to address the issues?  In my last sermon at the Chapel Worship of Faith Bible College, I talked about exegeting the culture so we may make real applications of Biblical truth to it.

There are people we bump into or walk pass by who like Tom are hurting and seeking medication to address their ailment. If we make the wrong prognosis and diagnosis, or worse, if we do not care, we provide no help.